ENBE was developed to give Elders a meaningful way to contribute by becoming actively involved in supporting New Brothers soon after they have completed their NWTA weekends. It is recommended that elders in a given community make contacts with the support and knowledge of community leaders (Steward, PIT trainers, I-group coordinators, Elder council chairs, Lead elders etc.)
Within that context, the ENBE provides the opportunity for a continuing connection and involvement for both Elders and New Brothers.
ENBE is not about an Elder being a mentor! A mentor is someone who teaches or gives help and advice to a less experienced and often younger person.
As Elder Brothers you are to asked to draw upon your Elder wisdom and ask questions that encourage the New Brother to respond, listen, then question and listen some more, to help a man clarify his thinking and support him in finding his own answers.
- It gives New Brothers the opportunity to connect and talk with a seasoned MKP Elder Brother (father or grandfather figure).
- It gives MKP Elders another pathway to make meaningful contributions.
- It provides an opportunity to strengthen MKP by keeping both Elders and New Brothers connected and involved…as a result, and importantly, increasing retention of both!
Key imperatives to functioning as an Elder Brother:
- See the New Brother as whole, not broken or in need of fixing.
- Understand that the New Brother has his own answers.
- The job of the Elder Brother is to question and listen, ask more questions, and listen more…to support men discovering their own answers and/or solutions.
- Avoid giving direction, advice or expressing opinions. (See sample questions below)
- In the event of a direct question for advice, Elder Brothers are encouraged to share their own experiences, without offering solutions or advice.
Launch: The doors are open to any MKP Elder who meets the following requirements:
- Agree to fully comply with the MKP USA NWTA Code of Ethics.
- Agree to not offer solutions or give advice. (Avoid Liability & Possible Lawsuits)
You are signing up to be available to have a call once or twice a month with a New Brother.
If not available in person, connect via phone, Zoom, Skype or other on-line conferencing systems. The initial agreement between an Elder Brother and a New Brother is for three months, with the option to continue for another three months, or more.
Sample questions an Elder Brother might ask:
- How is life going for you?
- What do you want for yourself?
- Are you in contact with any of the men from your weekend training?
- Are you in an I-group?
- If appropriate, as a response, have you taken that challenge to your I-group?
- What other kind of support do you have?
- What do you see as the one thing that would help you more than anything else?
- Related to any response, after you listen, ask, tell me more about that.
- What do you see as your alternatives or options?
- Are there other things to consider?
- What do you see as your best choice?
- How will moving in that direction support you?
- What actions are you willing to take to move you in that direction?
- Is there a specific order to your actions?
- How will you measure success?
- Tell me more…
Congratulations, by volunteering to be an Elder Brother, you have wisely chosen to do even more good within your MKP community and in the world! Your Area Lead Elder or his representative will provide a sign-up form and schedule a pre-launch ENBE Zoom meeting to address your questions.
Elders: Prior to upcoming NWTA’s.
New Brothers: Only at their integration meeting or at Welcome Home event